Monday, January 23, 2012

Motivation

Where does the motivation/desire to write come from?

Sometimes there are days when I can't stop myself from vomiting a three thousand word missive. Other days, I can barely form a coherent thought in less than 140 characters.

I think the closest I can compare it to is like an itch you have to scratch. It's there, not an unpleasant feeling necessarily, just something that is niggling at your subconscious. Something that wants out so badly that you can't help but sit down and start writing.

Slowly the desire to get it out on paper becomes too much and then I'm looking at ten thousand words that wasn't there earlier in the day. I've talked about this before in the blog where I'll be writing and suddenly three or four hours have flown by, I imagine that's what's supposed to happen when you enjoy what you do.

I think what I've learned about myself is that when that desire to write strikes, I have to literally strike when that iron is hot and just keep working until I collapse from hunger, or whatever TV I want to watch is now on. Today for instance, it's been a struggle just to finish a thought on this blog. I'll write a sentence and get distracted by whatever randomness... and then..

Well, my goal for today was to hit the 40k mark in Rosetta. According to the schedule I set for myself, I'm approximately 13k behind where I wanted to be at today. The good news is, 13k words to make up isn't terrible, especially when I have the whole thing outlined. The bad news is, I thought it would be a good idea to come to the coffee house without eating breakfast or lunch (mostly because there's a lack of food available, they never tell you starving artists actually starve sometimes...lol), but so long as I've got a few bucks for a cup of coffee, I should be OK, and able to hit my word count of 40k by tonight at midnight.

Weird sleep night last night. Feel asleep at 9 and woke up at 1:30am. Spent most of the night finishing season four of Breaking Bad... that show is probably the best thing on TV today, it's sad that they're ending it after the fifth season, though I can see how they may need to. All five seasons of that show apparently take place over the course of one year... Walt Jr. looks like he's about to graduate college, not high school and I'm willing to believe that Walt can get away with everything for only so long. Show runners like Vince Gilligan (Dan Harmon too) have the right idea. Go out on top, not at season twelve of "Fuck you, we're making too much money to care about the quality." Five-six seasons seems to be the sweet spot.

OK, I have no other excuse for not writing today. Time to get to it. Or, at least, time to get back to ignoring my own self-imposed deadline. My favorite new saying about my current situation is, I'm self-employed and my boss is an asshole.

It's true... he really is.


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